Doula Mel

Luckily he is tungsten-man

Just as we have all caught our breath from worrying about one parent, the other fogie gives us a big fright.  Pops always says we make him old and he is clearly getting his revenge by making us all worry.  On Sunday he had bad chest pains and EVENTUALLY (stubbornness hereditary) let my mom take him to hospital.  He was admitted and forced to stay despite much grumbling and demanding that he be sent home to cuddle his dog Nancy, watch his sport and smoke his stinky pipe.  He had to stay another night and was transferred to another hospital for more testing.   The tests revealed a mild heart attack and the angiogram a blockage.   He has come home tonight but goes back on Thursday to prepare for a bypass on Friday.   The man has had 3 heart attacks (the 1st at age 29 which he blames on us obviously) and a triple bypass at age 40.  He reckons he is made of tungsten and is one super strong dude.  I tend to agree but I think we are all more worried than we pretend to be.  As a family we cope with humour and downplaying, we don't do much dramatic wailing and weeping. 
As he has only just turned 60, he has got to be around for at least another 20 years till we are all grown up.   If ever I have my black fantasy (must blog about that sometime) where I am this tragic rich widow, I always have my dad to do man stuff.   On the incredibly rare occasions when I consider killing  leaving being left by Gary, I know my dad is around.   He has always been the big hero to his kids, especially to his 3 girls and we all need him way too much for married women of our age.   Apart from this need though, we love the old man and he may not go anywhere.  Dad, I love you, old Fart!  

Trixie-Blieksie Fifi girl

Sjoe but I am EXHAUSTED!    That was a very fun party but like any kids party, really tiring.   I had FORTY little critters running around which excludes siblings and Daniel and his mates.   Fortunately the weather was perfect and the venue great for kids of any age.   I went in early to set up and lugged tables and chairs and the likes setting it all up.  Then off home to make more of those pesky party packs and pack the last stuff.  I had my make-up bag in my bag determined to look gorg for the party but somehow it never quite made it to my face.   After the initial 20 minutes of stressing setting up last bits while little people were arriving, all went well.
The played pass the parcel, did potato & spoon, musical chairs and just had a jol.  In fact similar to how we use to have our parties.   I was lucky Gary took half the day off and came to my rescue bringing candles, more food, strong arms and some general assistance.   The party was a big success and I am glad Sofia had a good time, it is all that counts.  Rebeks got to have a few friends too so got more prezzies which as you, lights her fire baby!   Thanks to all their generous friends, you blessed us big time and it means loads to do over the school holidays.
And now, my note to my love.   (Too buggered for a long one here so will have to do short and sweet.)
Hey my big girl
Today you are FIVE!   Do you know how big that is, a whole hand!!    Mom & Dad wish you a very Happy Birthday Sofia.   We are all so lucky to have you in our lives.  You are the best hugger and cuddler, a really good ballerina, a great cutter-outer, as flexible as a rubber pretzel, excellent horse rider, have beautiful long blonde hair, have a special way with animals and you are kind and caring.  I am very proud of you Fifi.  Meeting you for the 1st time was the best thing ever.  Having a girl after being convinced you were a boy, well you can imagine what that was like for mom because we know boys are a big pain in the bum.  You were the sweetest baby and you have stayed the sweetest girl.  I pray you will have another 90 birthdays in your life, that God will send you a very handsome, kind and fun husband who loves Him and loves you as much as mom does.  I pray that you will have lots of children and I will get to babysit them lots.  I pray that you will always have friends who you care about and who care about you and make you laugh and make you happy.  I pray for good health for your gorgeous little body.   I pray you and I will always be close, you and Becks too.  I know she is very noisy but she loves you lots.   I am glad you had a fun party, it was our pleasure to give it to you.  Sleep tite Trixie-Blieks, tomorrow we play with all your new fun prezzies.
Mom. xxx 

Elvis wants her Mama

Holy Moly have I been sick the past 3 days!  It started on Wednesday night and continued to kill me slowly but thoroughly until today.  I seldom get flu like this and unfortunately Gary got sick too so we were both parent down.  I always envy people with older kids when they get sick, Dads too actually.  You JUST get to be sick.  Lie in bed and rest.  Moms, not so much.  
I ran a fever and shook and shivered (shake, rattle & roll baby!) and wished so much my mom could come and help.  Number 1 she lives too far to just pop in and number 2, sister Nina and family arrive from Korea tomorrow and I couldn't risk my mom getting ill.   We have discovered the toxins of the chemo linger for months and her immune system stays low.  She LOOKS fab tho', I love her pixie hairstyle and like the funky grey too.  Before I wanted her to colour her hair and not go grey.  It meant she was getting older and I wasn't quite ready for that.  Now with her having gone through the chemo and beaten its skanky ass, I am just grateful to have a mom and the hair is a bonus.  People love having the 'why bad things happen when God is supposed to be all loving etc' argument.  I am not going to get into that here and now but the sweet lessons we learn from times of hardship or trouble or tragedy somehow allow me to see His hand in the good AND bad times of life.    

Although I am exhausted, tomorrow my baby turns 5 years old and I am throwing her an amazing party.   For me, age five is my fave age.  I think it is even more so with little boys but still, 5 is just awesome for me.   I have gone overboard with the presents.   Because she is so undemanding and fairly quiet, I really wanted to give her much and have this fun party she would love.  The weather is going to be stunning... those sunny winter days when the sky is electric blue and everything is crisp and fresh.  I've baked, I've wrapped, I've made 26 little cardboard party packs with handles (frikkin' boring and now I am 8 short!) and now its just the last minute stuff to do.   Tomorrow I sneak in my little letter to my little love who I am privileged to mother. x

I have GOT to enter the lotto

I have told you ladies how I am pretty lucky with winning things.  Lately whenever I am somewhere with a lucky draw, I just know I am going to win.  Today was the last day of term.  Just over 3 glorious weeks of school holidays!  I know the weather is kak but at least we can sleep late or just lie in bed and cuddle and drink tea.  No rushing off to horse riding, ballet, soccer etc.   Every term one of Sofia's classes gets to host the school cake sale to raise funds.  The Busy Bees were up and they did a splendid job.  They have some REAL moms in their class, the super ones who throw amazing parties and bake incredibly and decorate everything perfectly.  One of our moms says 'how INCREDIBLE is the decor?'   'Huh?  Didn't notice,' I say.   'We have GOT to beat them next term!'   'Um, ok then.'    Seriously, just don't notice these things and despite being somewhat competitive, I am not when it comes to school stuff.  In fact I am probably a crap school mom not very involved or overly helpful.  I think being a bit shy and socially awkward in groups means I am even less inclined to get involved.  My excuse is BB... I will do the community, they can do the school stuff.  

So being a great customer I buy lots of cake and those yummy broken marie biscuit cocoa squares.  I also take 2 raffle tickets to win the splendid black & yellow bee cake complete with wings, legs and feelers.   I tell everyone I am going to win it.   The time arrives to leave and fetch Rebeka but they haven't done the draw yet and I am waiting for my cake.  Finally they do the draw and my name is called.  FREAKY Dudes!  Everyone was squealing in disbelief and looking at me like I was some kind of nutty psychic.   I was actually really embarrassed and felt myself blushing which I never do.   How weird is that?   I said I would win, I just knew I would and I did.   The cake is now in my freezer to be thawed on Monday morning when Fifi-girl turns 5.    Gary says enough of the cake and hairdo's and wine and books, I need to win something real now like money or a holiday.  I agree, it is time to step up my competition entering and hopefully win a trip to Disney or something.  In the meantime, it is now 93 sleeps till Mauritius, not that I am counting or anything...

Winter, not so much.

Drip, drip, drip.  My roof in the children's bathroom is really leaking.  You practically need a brollie when you sit on the loo.  I hate being cold, hate the endless rain and mud.  Some people LOVE winter.  I think in really cold countries, homes are geared up for it with central heating and the like.   We just have heaters that chow electricity.   With the SA energy crises and constant worry about power outages, we can't have all our heaters on all day.  Sorry no post yesterday, Sofia was really sick for 2 days with high temps and sore throat and ears.  I thought it was tonsillitis but it seems to be an ear infection AGAIN despite her being on antibiotics 6 weeks ago.   She is on a 2nd course again and another R630.   Spending money on Docs and medicine is a little like traffic fines.  It feels like such a waste of money but something you simply have to pay.  Last night I started getting sick too and lay in my bed pathetically wishing for Gary to come home to take over with kids and Zara.  
If I had that anon blog I would zip over to have a little spousal vent but not possible so I will just not say anything at all.  Grrrrrrrrr!
In my current melancholic state, I am not only cold and miz but think about the people in the townships all the time.  Living in cold and drafty tin homes, may of them leaking.  People simply die from cold here, it is f'ing ridiculous.   Those mothers I give bags to, many have to take their newborns back to those conditions.   Sometimes I want to die.  Literally, like be in heaven and not have to think about the suffering of people.  It gets all too much, how screwed up the world is, how poor and desperate people are here.   Blech, told you I was miserable.  I think its the yaz, stupid yasmin!   We are no longer BF's.  Silly cow, makes me weepy, periody all the time.  I had so hoped it would be the answer to my nightmare PMS episodes but it seems I need to try something else.  The only real benefit has been perky b00bs which is winner of course.   My perky b00bs and I are going to lie in the bath for a bit and try and thaw out a bit.  Hoping my mood will follow those b00bs and I will be more la la lah tomorrow.

Bye-bye ballerina girl

As a parent, one has all sorts of hopes, plans and dreams for your kid.  Many of them involve missed opportunities from your own childhood.  Some are just unachieved goals or unmet dreams.   There must be a hundred girly movies out there where the pushy mother is forcing her daughter to skate or dance or ride and achieve gold as the mother missed her chance when she was young.    Fortunately for my kids, they share a very average mother who was pretty competent at everything yet excelled at nothing in particular.  Some other stuff we want our kids to do... simply fun things you want your child to enjoy and learn from.
When Rebeka was little, I decided ballet was definitely her thing.  She is petite and graceful with a willowy figure.   Her 1st teacher was a real battle-axe and Rebeka wanted out at the end of the year.  (Me too!)   
I wanted her to dance so we tried a new teacher who she liked a whole lot more.   Surprise, surprise... my prima ballerina landed up being an average dancer but she enjoyed it so we carried on and enrolled her sister too. (Turns out Sofia shows more dancing promise with her flexible little strong body.)

This year Rebeka is less keen over her dancing.  She wants to do her art and with limited time and money, something has to give.    Me being thrifty me and a commitment nazi, told her she would need to finish the term and dance her best each and every week.   Today was her very last ballet class and we were both quite sad.   I suppose the fact that she hasn't any real ballet interest makes it easier but still, watching my little girl dance was obviously a sweet pleasure I will miss.   
 

My baby is staying

So, a quick summery of reasons for my torrent of tears I produced on Thursday afternoon, evening and Friday morning.  Firstly, hormones get the blame of course.  Remember how I was going to take the Yaz for 9 solid weeks and skip all placebos and not get a period?    I was going to be stable for 9 blissful weeks.  Seems skipping the placebo and going straight onto the active pills of the next packet doesn't fool my genius annoying body.   Still ate like a porker with a sweet snout and although I didn't want to kill anyone, I was very weepy.   Eight days later of active pills and I am still not in the clear so will have to phone super gynae.
But the real reason for the weeping... my Zara.   I had a bad day with her and at puppy school she nipped my daughter's little playmate on the chin.   Sweet Dani tried to pick her up while she was playing with her puppy friends and she got a growl and a nip.  Later Zara turned around and bit me on my ribs drawing blood once again.   It was the 2nd time that day she caused me to bleed from a nip and Rebeka also had a little bite on her foot.  I was very upset and thought she had an aggressive nature and she clearly had to go.   I was mortified that Dani was nipped.    I phoned Gary, cried, went to see 2 girlfriends and cried more.  We spoke to the rottie association and later Gary phoned her teacher who is also a behavioral specialist.   She didn't think Zara was aggro, just being a puppy and gave us some tips to handle her.   It has been much better and I am relieved I don't have to give her back.  I was totally heartbroken and sat loving her the whole evening when I though she would need to leave.   My brother accused me of being a dog person but it isn't so.  I am like that parent that only loves her own kid but isn't particularly fond of other peoples.  I love my Zara.   I am still not dog crazy although I did pet someone elses today.   Kids, I love all of them, well, most anyway. 
I promise not to become a boring dog blog. (Lord forbid!)   I have many topics dying to chat about including a few ones that will probably get my butt kicked.   Tomorrow I might just tackle the biggie... obese children and the accountability of adults they interact with.

Honouring Dads & my daughter

Happy Fathers Day to all the fathers out there.   My beloved Daddy aka Pops: I love and respect and admire you enormously.  The proof of parenting is in the pudding and you have SUCH winner kids.  Your 2nd eldest daughter, WHAT a woman!    I know you love her most (after Nancy your dog) and I just want to say I think it is amazing how you never reveal that to the other three kids.   To a romantic like myself, the way you treat mom is everything to me.  Although I am forced to agree with her occasional 'he's a pain in the arse' eye rolling teeth clenched mutter, I am also forced to agree with her:   'I love him so much and am so lucky to have him in my life.'

To my children's daddy... winner!   I love how you love them, how nothing else or no one else in the world has even then slightest bit of importance compared to them.  Your girls will know their real beauty and intrinsic value because of you and will only accept men who cherish and respect them like their daddy does.   And Daniel, I look forward to the way you will teach him this year, his 13th and I kind of bar mitzvah year for both of you.  Being a girl and all, I know I over analyze your relationship but I love how you guys are chilled together, love each other and nothing too deep or meaningful is needed to prove or reveal that.   This morning each child had to say something they love about Dad.  Daniel came up:   I love how it takes you so quick to brush your hair in the morning.  (Gary shaves his head)

Rebeka:   Happy Birthday my sweet girl.  I know you love your birthday like Mom does so treasure every second of today.  I am glad we could give you so many prezzies as we LOVE them, don't we!   You will get more from Auntie Tertia & Mimi today, how cool is that?!    I really am so proud of you, every single day.   Seven years ago you arrived and you have taught me so much.  You make being a mommy easy and every stage is special with you.   I know grade 1 was scary but look at how well you have done.   Remember the 1st time you do anything is scary but you just have to try stuff to see what you are good at.   Thanks for finishing ballet for me this term.   This Tuesday is your LAST dance then you can start art class.   God did a GREAT job with making you so creative and we can't wait to see all the things you make and do.   I love you Rebeks, happy birthday!  

The big slumber party

Oh I do so love being a girl mom.  Tomorrow Rebeka turns 7 which coincides with Father's Day so we had the party yesterday.  The girls arrived at 4.30 with pillows and blankets and teddy bears and much excitement.   I was a little worried a sleepover was too much for seven year olds but they were all so thrilled with the idea.   It was great fun.  Nine little girls: they made party hats, had potato and spoon races, made their own pizzas, ran around and insisted on bathing despite me trying to convince them otherwise.   We watched a movie and ate crap and eventually everyone fell asleep.  I offered prizes to the first 2 girls to fall asleep and mine were not the prize winners.  In the morning we had hot chocolate, made pancakes, got dressed, danced around and at 9.00am, everyone went home.   No one missed their mom, cried, hurt themselves, fought or were poorly behaved.   
I will be having many more slumber parties as I loved them when I grew up.  One of Daniel's friends spent the night with us and it was so cool for the little girls to have this cool 'big sister' person there.  We were chatting about sleepovers and amazed how they insisted on bathing and brushing their teeth.  Lucky for me, they clearly don't know the rules about no hygiene and no sleeping.   Here are a few pics.

How to help BB at the mo.

Hey all. Excuse my absence yesterday, I had a crises with Zara and I landed up bawling all evening.  I cannot tell you about it today as it is Rebeka's party and I am wearing make-up for a change and don't want to burst into tears all over again.  I hardly ever cry so for me to sob and chunk over a dog is really foreign.  Moving on...
BB is in the dwang at the moment.  With new premises and Tuli and Happiness working for us, our circumstances have changed.  I have also started buying nappies (under His conviction) which adds to our expenses quite a bit.  The irony is that apart from the money thing, we have almost no clothes and I am buying 90% of our stock.  Unfortunately most mothers in my community hang onto their clothing here and do not part with it very easily.   I don't understand having stuff in your closet for years when people around you have nothing in the winter but let me not go there as it makes me judgmental and bitchy and then tomorrow I do that grovel apologizing post and annoy all of you.
Thanks to all of who responded so generously to my FB request yesterday for clothing.  Some of you preferred to give money and as you know, I always feel blind with the money thing but am posting our bank details anyway as praying about it and then being a paw-paw, probably makes God wanna shake me about a bit.   I know some of you have also questioned the wisdom of expanding with the sewing project and ante-natal classes, but I think it is a faith thing.   It is such a need that surely God will honour it by sending the resources?   If I am wrong here, then we end it but we have to try at least.

I have 3 contacts for clothing, 1 US, 1 UK, 1 Switzerland.  Obviously they are all doing me a fave so I need to be really specific with requests here and hope you don't think I am being rude.  Please only send 0-3 months stuff.   No blankies for UK or Switzerland, just too bulky.  I have way more space in the US as often have people coming over so toothpaste, toothbrushes, soap etc also good.  New or gently used both perfect.  If you buy, remember my fave 5 pack onesies/vests or those 3 pack sleepers, winter if possible.  Wool is also a win as is light to carry.   Things that are very stained or rusty poppers don't make it in our bags.  For those of you who have friends coming over, please ask them if you can squeeze a little package in their luggage.  If they are relocating, even better! 

I really appreciate all the help and love and support you guys give us.  I love that you love our babies and our moms and they wear your babies old clothing on the other side of the world.   Thanks a kazillion.
xxx

Irma Fuchs / Bosom Buddies

c/o VeriSign Sarl
Route des Arsenaux 41
CH-1705 Fribourg

Switzerland

 

Dawnielle Chaney/ Bosom Buddies

1414 Cherry Valley Drive
San Jose
CA 95125
USA

 

Mrs Walker / Bosom Buddies

11 Leyfield Road
Aylesbury Bucks
Hp218bu
UK

 

SA Bank Details

Bosom Buddies
Nedbank
Branch Code 114145
Acc #: 1141018144

USA Bank Details
Thembalitsha

USA

Account nr:

2000027646173
562 Old Evans Road
Evans
Georgia
GA, 30809

Wachovia Bank

UK Bank Details
Thembalitsha UK
Bank: HSBC
Acc nr: 50072761
Sort Code: 40-08-68